One of the most disgusting stereotypes concerning Islam is that it condones and even encourages the abuse of women. Of course, Islam says nothing of the sort. The opposite is the case. At a time when women were nothing but the playthings and property of men Allah (SWT) commanded that they be given rights, respect and kindness.

How disturbing to hear that abuse of women still continues-- and that some men somehow think it is their right to even determine when women can talk on the telephone! Most recently I've heard stories of domestic abuse among Muslims that are absolutely terrifying and criminal.

Whoever thinks that this is Islamic is, in my opinion, ignorant of the merciful marriage of Islam. Not only is abuse not Islam, it is illegal and inhuman, cruel and wrong.

Neither the East nor the West has a monopoly on abuse of women. We hear of bride burning in some cultures, commercialized child sex trade in others. In the US 30% of all murdered women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends.

Christian men justify this by the wrong interpretation of the Biblical injunction "women, be obedient to your husbands". Muslim men also justify such actions on wrong and misguided readings of Qur'an and hadith. Do we forget that A'isha, Mother of Believers, was active in politics, military campaigns and clarification of hadith? Such Muslims, in an attempt to rationalize their women-hating, sex-obsessed attitudes and behaviors ignore the total ethos presented by the Qur'an and sunnah.

As Muslims we are commanded by Allah to enjoin what is good and fight what is evil. We are to be kind to fellow Muslims. Abuse of women and wife battering and oppression of women, restricted educational opportunities and forced seclusion, is unkind and evil. Men who are aware that their brothers are abusive to their wives MUST speak up and forbid this great evil. How can we be so quick to comment upon the lack of traditional hijab for women and fail to address abuse and battering when we are aware of its presence?! We strain at the gnat and swallow a camel!

We know that men who beat women tend to get worse. It begins with verbal abuse-- putting her down, being overly critical, having that sneer, contempt, or edge in his voice. It then progresses to hitting and slapping and then to life-threatening situations. Often, it leads to murder. Such men need help, the help of their brothers who are courageous enough to say "Stop!" And yes, courageous enough to call the police if need be.
A rapidly growing body of evidence shows that women's experience of violence has direct consequences, not only for their own well-being but also for that of their families and communities.

In addition to broken bones, third degree burns and other bodily injuries, abuse can have long-term mental health consequences, including depression, suicide attempts and post traumatic stress disorder. Violence involving sexual assault may also cause sexually transmitted diseases, unwanted pregnancies and other sexual and reproductive health problems.

For girls, the health consequences can carry on into their adult lives. Violence against women can also have inter-generational repercussions. For example, girls who witness the same sorts of violence are more likely than other girls to become involved in relationships in which their partners abuse them. Thus, violence tends to be carried over from one generation to the next.

The health care system, the judiciary, police and social services are largely ill-prepared to deal with the consequences of domestic violence or even recognize the signs. Both health care workers and the police must be trained to recognize the obvious and the more subtle signs of violence.

In addition community resources need to be made available for the victims of domestic violence and the police and judiciary should make it easier for the perpetrators of domestic violence to be punished. Women should and must be protected by society.

Battered women live in fear for their lives and safety as well as in financial fear. A little boy or girl who grows up witnessing battering will, as adults, be likely to batter or be battered themselves. Let's stop this horrendous cycle. If you hit your wife, get psychiatric help. If you are being hit get help.

If you're living within the U.A.E, the HOTLINE numbers are: 04-2697750 or Call: Iman Al Hashemi,(Director - Women Dawa'a Asssociation) Mobile: 050-5532296. International callers: +97150-5532296.

Read Also: Violence in Muslim societies contrary to Islamic teachings.

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